Traumatic Monday

I am so stinking mad this morning!!

Kamdyn has been coming to work with me for the past 3 weeks. Why? because I am here all by myself everyday and to keep my sanity I have been bringing her. It is amazing how nice it is just to have another person in the office with me. She plays well, watches TV and takes a nap. She is just company for me so that I don't get spiral into a depression.

Friday T (my boss) calls and tells me that we are going to have a "visitor" here on Monday and to make sure that I don't bring Kamdyn to work, so I took her to daycare today. She cried, begged and pleaded to come to work with me. She BEGS me to come to work with me. We packed her a bag every day with toys and movies for her to watch while she was here. This morning she grabs her bag as we are walking out the door, I remind her that she has to go to school today, she cries. She tells me that she is not big enough for school yet, she has to come to work with me. I cry. I want her here with me but I have to be the grown up and tell her no, she has to go to school. I hate hurting her like that.
We get to school and since she has not been there in a while there is confusion on how much money we owe to them so I am stuck standing there. I can't even leave her and go (like pulling a band aid off) I have to hold her for 10 minutes while theses idiots take their time. I really did like her day care until today. She is obviously traumatized so I tell them, please just take my money, if I owe you more than that call me. I will bring it by but I have got to go. I don't care at this point that I am late for work or anything. I want to get the leaving over with. Kam is already clinging very tightly to me. So I leave her crying.

What happens when I get to work???? T sends me an email..."oh our meeting with the visitor has been canceled. I will keep you informed on what is going on."

I so want to send that b***h an email telling her exactly what I think of her.

Sad News

Tuesday a baby was left in a hot car all day and died. I can not imagine how that father feels today. I am not blaming or judging because I unlike so many others who are screaming "What kind of Father forgets a baby in the car?!?!" completely understand how easy it is to forget. When Kam was about 6 months old I forgot her in the car. Thankfully I remembered about 10 minutes after I got out of the car but for those 10 minutes, I never once thought about her. I am a good mom, I take care of my kids wonderfully. They are all happy, healthy and loved unconditionally. How could I forget my baby?
Michael always picked Kam up from daycare but on this day I did for one reason or another. She was asleep in her car seat so she was very quiet. I got home and was immediately met by Tiffany (my niece who was watching Taylor, Colton, Payton and Keaton at my house) to tell me something that had happened that day. I was out of the car and in the house trying to access the damage. The house was a wreck, pots and pans filled with food on the table, stuff everywhere. I immediately started picking up. Never once thinking about my sweet baby sleeping in the car. After about 10 minutes one of the kids asked about Kam, and that is when it hit me. I had forgotten her. I will never forget that feeling I had in my stomach realizing that my sweet baby could have died. Thankfully it was not hot out yet and she was only in there for maybe 10 minutes.
So before anyone blames or says it would never happen to you....stop and think because it can.

Thankful!

I have so much in my life to be thankful for. My 3 healthy children, my loving husband, my family (in laws and out laws :)) I have everything in life that I need. I am so thankful that my kids had a wonderful day at school yesterday. They both came home with big smiles and lots of exuberance. I worry a lot about Taylor and being in Junior High. She is so sensitive and not one of those that can shake things off easily. Teenage girls can be so mean and I don't want my little girl to get hurt by them. So far she has emerged unscathed from most of the girl drama that happens in Lindale. For that I am so grateful. I hear other mothers talk about the trials that their daughters are going through with bully's and rumors, it breaks my heart that my sweet and innocent little girl is in that environment. Don't get me wrong, Lindale is a great school but there is drama. Taylor has already had 2 of her closest friends pulled out of school and home schooled because of girl drama. I pray daily that she puts God first and knows that the only thing important in life is what God thinks of her and not other people.
I am thankful that Colton has strong male influence in his life. I remember when he was littel 3 or 4 years old, if a man would show him even the slightest amount of attention, he was star struck. He loved men. His father and I separated when he had just turned 2 so in his life he does not remember his father ever living with him. Sometimes I think that we did such a disservice to our kids. I can't imagine growing up knowing that I have never lived with my father. He goes and visits his dad 3 times a year but that is not enough. God has put some very strong Godly men in his life and he loves them. They love him too, it is amazing when all these grown men come to me at church asking where Colton is and when he is going to be coming home from his dad's. God has done some wonderful things in my life and I am so very THANKFUL TO HIM!!!

First Day of School!

Yay it's the first day of school! Taylor was so excited this morning and ready to go! Colton was nervous. I heard him asking Taylor where he was supposed to go. I think starting at a new campus was a little stressful for him. The whole morning went off without a hitch until after I dropped them both off at school. Taylor called me and was panicked because she forgot her schedule. So me being the good Mom turned around and went back home to get her schedule. When I got back to her school all the kids were in the cafeteria. I asked one of the teachers at the front door how I could get it to her and she said that they didn't even need them today! They were not going to their classes for the first 2 days of school and would just be with their A/P teacher. They would get her a new one no problem.

I was 30 minutes late to work because I was worried about Taylor not having her schedule. This is after I told her last week to get her schedule off the fridge and put it in her notebook. grrr that girl owes me.

Kamdyn was not real happy this morning about getting up and going.

I am so thankful for my 7th grader, 5th grader and my daycare baby. They are all three such joys to be around and have such sweet spirits. I am so blessed!

School Supplies

Why is it that every year I go out and buy school supplies for my child's entire class? Why does a 5th grader need 3 packages of #2 pencils? How many do they think he is going to use over the course of 9 months? I understand that there are some people who can't afford to buy their kids supplies, but there are school supply trains that you can donate to. If they want to keep it confidential so the kids are not embarrassed then there are ways to do it. I can't afford to pay $50 per kid for school supplies along with everything else we have to pay for. This year has not started yet but I already know I will be paying for lunches, $3 per kid for agenda's, $7 per kid for class t-shirts, Colton will need $75 for Rockin C Ranch, Taylor needed $31 for band stuff. None of this even mentions, hair cuts for school, shoes, clothes and Colton's birthday which is always right here when school starts. NOR does it incorporate the cost of flying the kids home from their dad's at the first of August. Wow looking at it, I spend at least $1000 in August just on the kids and school. No wonder we are broke all the time!

Happy Birthday Colton!

10 years ago today I welcomed the most wonderful boy into my life. Happy Birthday to my sweet and loving son, you make my life so much brighter! I love you Colton Garrett!

Since it is Colton's birthday I wanted to tell his birth story -

*both my ex husband and my current husband are named Michael so for this story I will name him x-dh*

I found out I was pregnant December 26, 1999 and due 8/31/2000. My X-DH was based in Baltimore so I just called him and told him that I was pg. We were not really trying but had been separated for 4 months and when we got back together...I ended up pregnant. My pregnancy with Colton was really easy, I was not that sick and did got gain that much weight. I felt good up until the end of July/first of August. We are not good at waiting so in April of 2000 we found out Colt was a boy. We already had Taylor so we were very excited that we were having a boy. My x-dh worked for Southwest Airlines, and our health insurance only covered the cities where there were SWA bases. I had to find an OB in Dallas. I found a great one in Grapevine and was set to deliver at Baylor Grapevine. My labor with Taylor was pretty fast for my first baby so my dr decided to induce me on 8/18/2000. He really did not want me to have to travel 2 hrs to the hospital while in labor. The morning of the 18th we got up at 3 because we had to be at the hospital at 6 for induction. Mom and Stacy went up with us. We got to the hospital, got checked in to the room and all settled about 7. Dr. Rost came in at 7:15am and gave me cervidil to start my labor. Cervidil is usually given at the dr's office to soften your cervix and start labor naturally, but not immediately. I was already 70% effaced and dilated to a 2 so the dr figured this would be enough to get things moving.

He came back through around 7:45am to check me and to break my water. When he came checked me I was about 90% and dilated to a 3 and all the remnants of the pill was gone. I remember being so embarrassed that "I" had disolved that pill completely so quickly! he broke my water and labor started for real then. Colton had a little bit of trouble with his heart rate so they pushed in lots of fluids (3 bags in an hr) and would not let me get off the monitor so I had to use the bed pan....not the most fun thing to have to do!!! It was awful, I couldn't get up, couldn't get an epidural and had to pee constantly. Things progressed along well and about 10:30 I was far enough dilated to get the epidural but the anesthesiologist was in the ER with a major mva. My mom pulled a Shirley McClaine and told the nurses that they better get someone else to my room immediately! Needless to say I had an epidural within 30 minutes. After I got the epidural I felt good, it did not work on one spot of my abdomen so I felt like someone was stabbing me but it was manageable so I was not sweating it. Mom and Stacy decided to go get lunch about 12:15 or so, I was resting and we thought it was going to be another couple of hours because by the time I got my epidural I was only 7. My dr came in at 12:30 to check me and said that I was ready to go, I freaked! He said that I could rest for 15 minutes then I would need to start pushing. I sent my x-dh down to the cafeteria to get my mom. The nurse came in about 12:45 to have me do some practice pushes, I asked for the mirror cause I wanted to see. I saw about a quarter size of Colton's golden brown hair, it was so sweet. I pushed 2x and he was crowning. The nurse ran to get the dr and to get the room set up. 2 funny things happened during delivery, I had a dead leg. Literally. I could not get that leg to cooperate for anything. I was just wildly swinging it trying to get it in the stirrup, finally the dr grabbed it and put it up for me. Secondly Colton's big ol head had sealed up the hole when they broke my water, so after he was born, amniotic fluid shot up on the nurse and dr. The nurse jumped 2 feet in the air I swear. I could hear my x-dh and my sister snickering and that made me start laughing. My dr fussed at me and said for me to stop laughing and push. Colton was born at 1:07pm

He was a big ol boy for being 2 weeks early. He weighed 8lbs 14ozs and was 20 3/4 inches long. Poor guy was bruised all up because he came down the birth canal so quickly but he was gorgeous. He had all this beautiful golden brown hair and this fat sweet face. Taylor was not really interested in him, she was more enamored of the other babies. Not the one that her momma was holding and loving on.

Well that was my big day 10 years ago, one of the 3 best days of my life!

New Week

Here we are in a new week. It's Tuesday. I still have Kam at work with me, I am such a pushover. She cries and I don't have the heart to send her to daycare. She hasn't been to daycare in 13 days, almost 2 weeks. She has spent every day since the kids came home here with me. I love having her here and she is so good, I wish I could keep her with me all the time. Yesterday she went to Judy's house and last night I could not tolerate her. It was weird, if I am with her all day then she does not bother me but if I am not, everything she does gets on my nerves. You would think it would be the opposite. If I didn't spend the day with her then I would be so happy to see her and everything she does just rolls off my back.

We told Colton that he could not quit football last night. He was so upset but I can't stand the thought of letting him quit something. The one rule that we have regarding extracurricular activities is that if you sign up, then you finish.

We have meet the teacher tonight at both the kids schools so that should be lots of fun. I hate running from one place to the other trying to get everything done. I get stressed out and short with the kids. But thankfully it will be over and done with after tonight. Kids start school on Monday so that part of our lives will start again. I am excited about it, I love getting back into the routine of things.

First Week Back

So we have made it to our first week back together, boy what a week. Last Wednesday night Stacy and I left at 9pm from Terrell and drove 5 hrs to Oklahoma City, OK to pick up Mom and the kids. My poor sweet Momma left Dallas at 7am on Wednesday morning (which means she had to check in at 6am, leave Stacy's house at 5am) She got into Albuquerque about 7am their time and waited to leave for SLC at 11:40am. Barely got on the plane to SLC and made it to pick up the kiddos at 12:40. Taylor and Colton's dad had brought them to the airport so when mom got there they did the exchange and Mom and the kids waited to catch a flight to Phoenix. Well apparently there was a bad lightning storm and all flights were delayed for hours. Mom was supposed to leave at 2:00 but ended up not leaving until 4:40 so she missed all the connecting flights from Phoenix to Dallas. She then re-routed to Oklahoma City so that Stacy and I could drive up there and get them but we did not know if she was going to make that flight or have to go to Houston until 7:40pm. Her flight landed in OKC at 10:30 but since Stacy and I did not know until then where she was actually going to be, we did not make it to OKC until 1:30am. We picked them up and turned around an drove straight back home. The kiddos and I did not make it home until 7:15am on Thursday morning. It was a LONG trip.

Needless to say, I stayed home from work but poor Taylor, she had to leave for church camp at 12:30 until Saturday. She was all hyped up and would not take a nap at all. She did ok though and ended up having a wonderful time at camp. I am so glad that she loves doing stuff like that so much. Colton stayed home with me until Sat night and then he went to spend the night with his bff Corbin. He stayed with him for 2 nights and then came home on Monday. That was such a big mistake. He was tired and cranky and ended up quitting football. I was so pissed off at him. That was $85 down the drain, cause you can't get any of your money back. But it is done and I can't stay mad at him or hold a grudge. He is just not going to get to do anything else for a while since he can't keep his commitment.

So far everyday this week I have brought the kids to work with me, well at least Kamdyn. But I hate to separate them after they have been apart for so long. So far it has gone very well but school starts in a week and a half so that will stop soon.

Tomorrows the day :o)~

Tomorrow is the big day, the day I have been waiting for, for 5 weeks. Taylor and Colton come home!!!!! Yay. I am so ready to have my kids back and everything to be back to normal. Don't get me wrong, it has been nice for them to be gone. Groceries are less, I don't have to worry about them being home all day by themselves making messes and I come home to a clean house. But still I want them home with me. Nothing else matters to me. My poor mom is going to pick them up, she is in for a long day, but then so are the kids. But they don't have to head out until 2, she has to be at the airport at 5am to catch a plane. Yuck. Been there, done that. It sucks. But tomorrow my kids will be on one of these...

on their way back home to their momma ;)

REXY

So for my birthday I went and bought myself a new baby. He is so sweet. His name was Rex but I call him Rexy which Michael thinks is gay. He is 8 weeks old and just the cutest thing ever! He is a mutt but looks just like a Min Pin, I think his mom was a chi/min pin mix and his dad was a datsun, so he is a hodge podge of little dogs. So far he has been pretty good. He is a mean little devil though. Kamdyn loved him with a passion for about a day, then after he got acclimated to our house and started attacking her at every turn, not so much.

Here is the funniest part, Michael. He griped and complained about me getting a puppy but does he look unhappy about having him?

Nooooo, that puppy is already so spoilt it is not funny. Taylor and Colton do not know anything about him so Shhhh! don't tell them. They are in for a huge surprise when they come home in 2 DAYS! Can't wait... I love my kiddos, especially since they have been gone for 5 weeks. That just makes me love them so much more.